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By Sabine Durrant
ISBN: 9781476716329
Publisher: Atria/Emily Bestler Books
Publication Date: 5/26/2015
Format: Hardcover
My Rating: 5 Stars

A special thank you to Atria/Emily Bestler Books and NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

REMEMBER ME THIS WAY by Sabine Durrant is a chilling psychological suspense thriller, a mystery of intrigue, leaving the reader pondering . . . which character is more twisted?

“You can love and hate someone at the same time. You can so pity them it’s like a fist in your stomach, be so resentful you want to hit them. They can be the best thing that ever happened to you, and the worst. You can have thoughts of leaving them, and yet the memory of their skin, the pads of their fingers across your rib cage . . . these can take your breath away, even for a year.“

Lizzie’s husband Zach was killed in an accident and a year later, on Valentine’s Day, after everyone has told her to move on, here she is walking down the road where he died, trying to remember him the right way. When she arrives, she finds flowers and a note. Someone else cares about her husband, plus she feels someone is always watching her? Stalking her? Who is Xenia?

All the self-help books with their formal stages from grief, shock, disbelief, bargaining, anger, depression, and final acceptance. She thinks she has pathological grief. No one is out to get her, it’s pathological. Survivor’s guilt, Leaver’s guilt. Unfinished business.

“Thank God he died before he read the letter. That’s one thing to be grateful for. He never learned her betrayal. When I get there I will burn it. She had decided to leave and written a letter which would be waiting for him in Cornwall. She had spoken to him an hour before he died.”

If Lizzie had to face the truth, she most likely would never have left him, as it was his darkness that drew her in, his obsession and insecurities. Everyone thought he was such a catch and she was so lucky.

What comes next is twisted, and chilling making Lizzie wonder who Zach really was (or is)? Strange things begin happening, leading her to second guess Zach’s death – the body was hardly unidentifiable, what if he is really still alive and watching her?

Zach was always so controlling, possessive, and jealous… narcissistic behavior—stating she better never leave him. Zach is clever…what about the painting, the message, the breakin, the diary, the lies, his past, Sam …Evil can be attractive- she is haunted and possibly mad, or PTSD? She wanted to escape him. Did his love for Lizzie, lead him to his death? Lizzie’s mind since he died has her twisted and manipulated; dreaming of hauntings and revenge, waiting for violence?

Switching from Zach to Lizzie, from past to present, the author keeps you glued to the pages with intensity of solving the mystery, if Zach is alive or dead, and more about each personality; if the accident is a charade of torment in the event he had read her letter, or if there is someone else trying to drive her nuts.

Zach is one mind-blowing psycho guy, (thriller readers will love his sadistic, mind, mixed with humor), as Lizzie digs further into this past, she begins to wonder if anything he said or did was real? However, both Lizzie and Zach are complex, keeping you wondering if Lizzie is wacko.

We also meet some secondary characters which add some deliciously evil and scandalous suspense and secrets, as well as the poor dog Howard. Can she move on with a new life with someone else? Does Zach still hold power over Lizzie even from the grave? Will she ever be free of his hold over her? Will she always be looking over her shoulder, hoping he will be there?

My first book by Durrant and looking forward to reading more. Well-developed characters and twists and turns, for a compelling psychological suspense thriller. Loved the mysterious front cover depicting the road, the accident, and what lies behind the fog, the curve, the tree, the person behind the wheel—drawing you in. Gone Girl fans will love this one!

“Four percent of the population is supposed to fit the definition of sociopath. That’s one in twenty-five of us living without a conscience.” ---darn scary!